Wednesday, May 22, 2013

Just Say No to Gas Station Chinese Food

Val here -

I love Thomas. Truly I do. However - I need to share a little story about the WORST DATE EVAR. (so bad I have to say evar instead of ever.)

A few weeks ago, in the midst of all my school craziness, we decided we needed a nice date night. I got myself all dolled up and ready to go. Our plan was to go to Tobacco Haus after getting dinner. We were both in the mood for Chinese food. Usually we will stop by the buffet place in the same strip center as Tobacco Haus, but Thomas said he saw a new flier for a Chinese restaurant on the door. Quik Wok. We should try the new restaurant in town.

Okay, why not? So I enter the address in my GPS and we head out - it isn't far from us.

We pull up to the shopping center that it is supposed to be in, but much to our astonishment it is not in one of the other spots in the building - it is actually in the Shell Station. 0.o

We are dubious - and he DID offer to go elsewhere - but ladies - you know how it is - you agree to go elsewhere and he points out how whenever he picks out the place you want to go somewhere I said that I was fine, lets just try it (Mistake #1)

The interior of the gas station looks immaculate, as if it has recently been painted, and the restaurant area looks clean, so we put in our order and we have to pay first (WARNING) we pay, and find a seat.

I needed the facilities, so I asked about them - I am warned that there is only one bathroom. I get the key - looking at it - the women's room had a paper sign over the door saying storage. The men's room was the only one for public use. I walk in and well - I have used public bathrooms all over the world and nothing has prepared me for the nastiness. The floor was decorated with a festive stream of toiletpaper everywhere. There was something sticky on the counter and the toilet seat was covered in urine and the toilet bowl seemed to be full of some white funky stuff. I backed out slowly, handed the key to staff and said - that is the most disgusting bathroom I have ever seen. He just agreed and went back to work - no apology, no offer to clean it.

I am now even more worried about the food.

When I get back to the table, I tell Thomas and he laughs - he takes me to the classiest places, doesn't he?

He offers to get me a drink - and comes back with a tall boy can of mountain dew. :/

The food comes out - and their staff were very nice - so I hate to say what comes next, but I have to be honest here.

I ordered orange chicken. It is one of my favorite dishes. I also got spring rolls - another dish I like for an appetizer. The spring rolls were greasy - and the fish oil, despite the red pepper flakes had very little flavor.

When dinner got there it was mushy. The chicken had poor texture and no flavor other than spice - There was one orange peel thrown in as garnish, but the sauce had no citrus taste - it was just so spicy that my mouth was numb.

A couple guys shuffle up to our table asking for change - while we are eating -

Then they started mopping. With strong bleach. Just in the restaurant area. Now I had mushy spicy bleach flavored chicken.

Then when I couldn't stomach any more the food hit my stomach and wanted out - but there was no way I was going to try that bathroom again - so we drove home in a hurry - needless to say we never got to Tobacco Haus and we were sick for two days.

So if your boyfriend takes you to gas station chinese food, for the love of all that is beautiful on this earth - accept his offer to go elsewhere.

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